Pslams 44

Psalm 44

Former Deliverances and Present Troubles.

For the choir director. A Maskil of the sons of Korah.

1O God, we have heard with our ears,
Our (A)fathers have told us
The (B)work that You did in their days,
In the (C)days of old.
2You with Your own hand (D)drove out the nations;
Then You (E)planted them;
You (F)afflicted the peoples,
Then You (G)spread them abroad.
3For by their own sword they (H)did not possess the land,
And their own arm did not save them,
But Your right hand and Your (I)arm and the (J)light of Your presence,
For You (K)favored them.
4You are (L)my King, O God;
(M)Command victories for Jacob.
5Through You we will (N)push back our adversaries;
Through Your name we will (O)trample down those who rise up against us.
6For I will (P)not trust in my bow,
Nor will my sword save me.
7But You (Q)have saved us from our adversaries,
And You have (R)put to shame those who hate us.
8In God we have (S)boasted all day long,
And we will (T)give thanks to Your name forever. Selah.
9Yet You (U)have rejected us and brought us to (V)dishonor,
And (W)do not go out with our armies.
10You cause us to (X)turn back from the adversary;
And those who hate us (Y)have taken spoil for themselves.
11You give us as (Z)sheep to be eaten
And have (AA)scattered us among the nations.
12You (AB)sell Your people cheaply,
And have not [a]profited by their sale.
13You make us a (AC)reproach to our neighbors,
A scoffing and a (AD)derision to those around us.
14You make us (AE)a byword among the nations,
A (AF)laughingstock among the peoples.
15All day long my dishonor is before me
And my (AG)humiliation has overwhelmed me,
16Because of the voice of him who (AH)reproaches and reviles,
Because of the presence of the (AI)enemy and the avenger.
17All this has come upon us, but we have (AJ)not forgotten You,
And we have not (AK)dealt falsely with Your covenant.
18Our heart has not (AL)turned back,
And our steps (AM)have not deviated from Your way,
19Yet You have (AN)crushed us in a place of (AO)jackals
And covered us with (AP)the shadow of death.
20If we had (AQ)forgotten the name of our God
Or extended our hands to (AR)a strange god,
21Would not God (AS)find this out?
For He knows the secrets of the heart.
22But (AT)for Your sake we are killed all day long;
We are considered as (AU)sheep to be slaughtered.
23(AV)Arouse Yourself, why (AW)do You sleep, O Lord?
Awake, (AX)do not reject us forever.
24Why do You (AY)hide Your face
And (AZ)forget our affliction and our oppression?
25For our (BA)soul has sunk down into the dust;
Our body cleaves to the earth.
26(BB)Rise up, be our help,
And (BC)redeem us for the sake of Your lovingkindness.

This psalms is a very interesting one. It begins completely recognizing the sovereignty of God and ends recognizing the sovereignty of God and yet begins v.1-9 with incredible praise and then 10-26 in great despair. I could just feel the joy and goodness of the beginning and then the incredible despair. How great is the psalmists despair that he cries out "Why do You sleep, O lord?" and "Why do You hide Your face and forget our affliction and our oppression?" Surely our God is not alseep and not forgetful the way man is and yet his despair makes him feel so. Even in despair he follows the same believe that, "I will not trust in my bow, nor will my sword save me" because it is all God, all God and no one else. In good times and bad he can see this. But recognizing such sovereignty makes it seems as if Maskil is accusing God-and in a way he is. He accuses God of sleeping and forgetting because with his pinkie or his breathe, God could rescue His people. I can completely understand both. Is Maskil wrong? David does this often too, pleading for God almighty to rescue them and pleading for him not to turn his face and forget. Even Moses does this pleading with God to save Israel after the golden calf. I guess that's the position we are meant to be in, completely powerless, stripped of agency and therefore humbled, pleading God on the basis of his own nature to save. The same God is constant forever and is still the God who will "redeem us for the sake of Your lovingkindness."

Psalm 43

Psalm 43

Prayer for Deliverance.

1^(A)Vindicate me, O God, and ^(B)plead my case against an ungodly nation;
O deliver me from ^(C)the deceitful and unjust man!
2For You are the ^(D)God of my strength; why have You ^(E)rejected me?
Why do I go ^(F)mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?
3O send out Your ^(G)light and Your truth, let them lead me;
Let them bring me to Your ^(H)holy hill
And to Your ^(I)dwelling places.
4Then I will go to ^(J)the altar of God,
To God my exceeding ^(K)joy;
And upon the ^(L)lyre I shall praise You, O God, my God.
5^(M)Why are you in despair, O my soul?
And why are you disturbed within me?
Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him,
The help of my countenance and my God.

hope in God. the help of my countenance and my God.
for the sake of thy lovingkindness, help.

i dont have much to say, maybe i should paste my email to you guys here. im just learning how to trust in God in everything, especially the "bad" stuff. been talking with my roommate more, its been pretty cool.

something cj mahaney said something i've been thinking about... the more you are aware of God's divine initiative, the more you will be amazed at the grace of God. he chose us, apart from his gracious choice of you, you never would have chosen him. you didnt discover God, he revealed himself to you.

im thinking, how am i here, why has God been so good to me.

the secret things belong to the Lord, and the things he has chosen to reveal belong to us. its hard to go on when the end seems so far away. but i definately havent fought my sin to the point of shedding blood.

why are you in despair, o my soul
why are you disturbed within me
hope in God, for i shall yet praise him.
the help of my countenance and my God

CJ mahaney: here is the only reason i am a Christian, he chose me.

Psalm 42

1 As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul pants for You, O God. 2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God; when shall I come and appear before God? 3 My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all day long, "Where is your God?" 4 These things I remember and I pour out my soul within me. For I used to go along with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God, with the voice of joy and thanksgiving, a multitude keeping festival.

5 Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him for the help of His presence. 6 O my God, my soul is in despair within me; therefore I remember You from the land of the Jordan and the peaks of Hermon, from Mount Mizar. 7 Deep calls to deep at the sound of Your waterfalls; all Your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me. 8 The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime; and His song will be with me in the night, a prayer to the God of my life.

9 I will say to God my rock, "Why have You forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?" 10 As a shattering of my bones, my adversaries revile me, while they say to me all day long, " Where is your God?" 11 Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.

Today I was reminded of my inefficiencies in how I study for school and small group, in what I do with all the sermons I hear, in meeting up with people, in general just doing the things I'm supposed to do. I cant do all that I am supposed to because if I could, what need would I have for the cross? Through my inadequacy I see the complete adequate work of the cross from which I have everything. I've been trying to remember my sin more because I realize I hide it from myself really well by having a bad memory. But when I sin again in a similar fashion than I have before, I remember the last time I did it and the time before that, like being angry with Matt, or being prideful which results in anger with Edmund. Im tired of being sinful guys. I want so much to not be so disobedient to the commands that our great God calls us to walk in, but how quickly I forget the feeling of wanting to obey when I am in a situation where I am succeptible to judging or being prideful. I long for heaven and unhindered fellowship with the God that truely loves us, and a time where we wont be the ones who repeatedly mock Him and act as if we dont know Him.

Psalm 41

Psalm 41

1How blessed is he who considers the helpless;
The LORD will deliver him in a day of trouble.
2The LORD will protect him and keep him alive,
And he shall be called blessed upon the earth;
And do not give him over to the desire of his enemies.
3The LORD will sustain him upon his sickbed;
In his illness, You restore him to health.
4As for me, I said, "O LORD, be gracious to me;
Heal my soul, for I have sinned against You."
5My enemies speak evil against me,
"When will he die, and his name perish?"
6And when he comes to see me, he speaks falsehood;
His heart gathers wickedness to itself;
When he goes outside, he tells it.
7All who hate me whisper together against me;
Against me they devise my hurt, saying,
8"A wicked thing is poured out upon him,
That when he lies down, he will not rise up again."
9Even my close friend in whom I trusted,
Who ate my bread,
Has lifted up his heel against me.
10But You, O LORD, be gracious to me and raise me up,
That I may repay them.
11By this I know that You are pleased with me,
Because my enemy does not shout in triumph over me.
12As for me, You uphold me in my integrity,
And You set me in Your presence forever.
13Blessed be the LORD, the God of Israel,
From everlasting to everlasting.
Amen and Amen.

i write this at 4 in the afternoon. i got back at 5 am and just came back from eating with hannah and a bunch of girls. hannah is leaving to korea next week. total estimated driving time is 12-13 hours...and how did ppl know i went to norcal? what happened to my secret keepers? its ok. =P
i was battling exhaustion most of the drive up and down...but more than that i was battling wrong thinking. my mind can't fight for truth if it itself is not grounded in it. and i realize how prone i am to thinking wrong things most of the time.
i know all of us are going through a lot of things right now girls...but i pray that we are all going through these things well. our Lord helps the helpless, our Lord protects the defenseless, our Lord sustains the weak and heals our souls. even when our most trusted friends and family desert us...He will never leave us. we are so quick to forsake the greatest Lover of our souls, but He is so quick to receive us back....running to meet us.

Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Amen and Amen.

Amen and Amen.

ever think about what amen means?
אמן
'âmên
aw-mane'
From H539; sure; abstractly faithfulness; adverbially truly: - Amen, so be it, truth.

so be it. blessed be the Lord.

Psalm 40

Psalm 40
1I waited patiently for the LORD; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry.
2He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.
3And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD.
4Blessed is that man that maketh the LORD his trust, and respecteth not the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.
5Many, O LORD my God, are thy wonderful works which thou hast done, and thy thoughts which are to us-ward: they cannot be reckoned up in order unto thee: if I would declare and speak of them, they are more than can be numbered.
6Sacrifice and offering thou didst not desire; mine ears hast thou opened: burnt offering and sin offering hast thou not required.
7Then said I, Lo, I come: in the volume of the book it is written of me,
8I delight to do thy will, O my God: yea, thy law is within my heart.
9I have preached righteousness in the great congregation: lo, I have not refrained my lips, O LORD, thou knowest.
10I have not hid thy righteousness within my heart; I have declared thy faithfulness and thy salvation: I have not concealed thy lovingkindness and thy truth from the great congregation.
11Withhold not thou thy tender mercies from me, O LORD: let thy lovingkindness and thy truth continually preserve me.
12For innumerable evils have compassed me about: mine iniquities have taken hold upon me, so that I am not able to look up; they are more than the hairs of mine head: therefore my heart faileth me.
13Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me: O LORD, make haste to help me.
14Let them be ashamed and confounded together that seek after my soul to destroy it; let them be driven backward and put to shame that wish me evil.
15Let them be desolate for a reward of their shame that say unto me, Aha, aha.
16Let all those that seek thee rejoice and be glad in thee: let such as love thy salvation say continually, The LORD be magnified.
17But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinketh upon me: thou art my help and my deliverer; make no tarrying, O my God.

The Lord is so faithful. I remember turning to this psalm a lot last month, when God was teaching me to wait patiently on him. It's still crazy for me to realize how reliable God is--whenever we pray to him, he responds in some way, and whatever he says, he is always so true to his word. It's humbling to me when i think of how fickle and temperamental i am. There is nothing about me that is constant, yet God is eternal--from everlasting to everlasting. I remember relating to verse 12--"my iniquities have taken hold upon me, so that I am not able to look up.. my heart faileth me"--and I dont really remember why or how, but just looking at myself right now--i'm okay, i have God's joy in my heart--proves to me once again how faithful God is. He reveals our sin to us for our own good, and our feeling so burdened and weighed down by how sinful we are is just another result of our fleshliness. I wish that whenever God teaches me a lesson, no matter how painful it may be, my first reaction would be joy instead of woe. Joy in God's faithfulness, joy in the assurance that God is sanctifying me, and most importantly, joy in my salvation.

Make no tarrying, O my God, come deliver us from whatever's keeping us from you right now.

Psalm 39

to be updated by sarah...

Psalm 38

Psalm 38

Prayer of a Suffering Penitent.

A Psalm of David, for a memorial.

1O LORD, ^(A)rebuke me not in Your wrath,
And chasten me not in Your burning anger.
2For Your ^(B)arrows have sunk deep into me,
And ^(C)Your hand has pressed down on me.
3There is ^(D)no soundness in my flesh ^(E)because of Your indignation;
There is no health ^(F)in my bones because of my sin.
4For my ^(G)iniquities are gone over my head;
As a heavy burden they weigh too much for me.
5My wounds grow foul and fester
Because of ^(H)my folly.
6I am bent over and ^(I)greatly bowed down;
I ^(J)go mourning all day long.
7For my loins are filled with ^(K)burning,
And there is ^(L)no soundness in my flesh.
8I am ^(M)benumbed and badly crushed;
I ^(N)groan because of the agitation of my heart.
9Lord, all ^(O)my desire is before You;
And my ^(P)sighing is not hidden from You.
10My heart throbs, ^(Q)my strength fails me;
And the ^(R)light of my eyes, even that has gone from me.
11My ^(S)loved ones and my friends stand aloof from my plague;
And my kinsmen ^(T)stand afar off.
12Those who ^(U)seek my life ^(V)lay snares for me;
And those who ^(W)seek to injure me have threatened destruction,
And they ^(X)devise treachery all day long.
13But I, like a deaf man, do not hear;
And I am like a ^(Y)mute man who does not open his mouth.
14Yes, I am like a man who does not hear,
And in whose mouth are no arguments.
15For ^(Z)I hope in You, O LORD;
You ^(AA)will answer, O Lord my God.
16For I said, "May they not rejoice over me,
Who, when my foot slips, ^(AB)would magnify themselves against me."
17For I am ^(AC)ready to fall,
And ^(AD)my ^[a]sorrow is continually before me.
18For I ^(AE)confess my iniquity;
I am full of ^(AF)anxiety because of my sin.
19But my ^(AG)enemies are vigorous and ^[b]strong,
And many are those who ^(AH)hate me wrongfully.
20And those who ^(AI)repay evil for good,
They ^(AJ)oppose me, because I follow what is good.
21Do not forsake me, O LORD;
O my God, ^(AK)do not be far from me!
22Make ^(AL)haste to help me,
O Lord, ^(AM)my salvation!

i dont think im suffering enough to honestly say some of the things that he petitions to the Lord. something i think im suffering that much, but really im not. im very quick to look full on myself instead of remembering the hope that i have in Christ. at the same time, alot of the things he has said i can relate with because no matter the circumstance God gives people, the soul i guess has its limits and something easy for one person, might be the life trial of another. im very weak i realized. but i think we can imply from the psalm that david feels pretty weak right now too. he honestly tells God how he feels and his suffering, and earnestly petitions to the Lord. from the last 2 verse you can tell that God is his hope, his only refuge because it is to Him that he turns and remembers. Make haste to help me, O Lord, my salvation! i can image him shouting this out, with vigor and desperation but also with confidence not in himself but in God. its interesting how he says O Lord, my salvation. once my friend told me once someone asked her if she would want to be in heaven if she had all the benefits, but God wasnt there. and thats interesting thought. do i want to be at rest, have peace, and everything like that more than i want God? he says the Lord is his salvation. and the point of heaven is to be with God, and the point of living is to know and trust God more before we're glorified. everything points to God.

the joy of the Lord is my strength.

Psalm 37

1 Do not fret because of evildoers, be not envious toward wrong doers. 2 For they will wither quickly like the grass and fade like the green herb. 3 Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. 4 Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. 5 Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will do it. 6 He will bring forth your righteousness as the light and your judgement as the noonday.

7 Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who carries out wicked schemes. 8 Cease from anger and forsake wrath; do not fret; it leads only to evildoing. 9 For evildoers will be cut off, but those who wait for the Lord, they will inherit the land. 10 Yet a little while and the wicked man will be no more; and you will look carefully for his place and he will not be there. 11 But the humble will inherit the land and will delight themselves in abundant prosperity.

12 The wicked plots against the righteous and gnashes at him with his teeth. 13 The Lord laughs at him, for He sees his day is coming. 14 The wicked have drawn the sword and bent their bow to cast down the afflicted and the needy, to slay those who are upright in conduct. 15 Their sword will enter their own heart, and their bows will be broken.

16 Better is the little of the righteous than the abundance of many wicked. For the arms of the wicked will be broken, but the Lord sustains the righteous. 18 The Lord knows the days of the blameless, and their inheritance will be forever. 19 They will not be ashamed in the time of evil, and in the days of famine they will have abundance. 20 But the wicked will perish; and the enemies of the Lord will be like the glory of the pastures, they will vanish-like smoke they vanish away. 21 The wicked borrows and does not pay back, but the righteous is gracious and gives. 22 For those blessed by Him will inherit the land, but those cursed by Him will be cut off.

23 The steps of a man are established by the Lord, and He delights in his way. 24 When he falls, he will not be hurled headlong, because the Lord is the One who holds his hand. 25 I have been young and now I am old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken or his descendants begging bread. 26 All day long he is gracious and lends, and his descendants are a blessing.

27 Depart from evil and do good, so you will abide forever. 28 For the Lord loves justice and does not forsake His godly ones; they are preserved forever, but the descendants of the wicked will be cut off. 29 The righteous will inherit the land and dwell in it forever. 30 The mouth of the righteous utters wisdom, and his tongue speaks justice. 31 The law of his God is in his heart; his steps do not slip. 32 The wicked spies upon the righteous and seeks to kill him. 33 The Lord will not leave him in his hand or let him be condemned when he is judged. 34 Wait for the Lord and keep His way, and He will exalt you to inherit the land; when the wicked are cut off, you will see it.

35 I have seen a wicked, violent man spreading himself like a luxuriant tree in its native soil. 36 Then he passed away, and lo, he was no more; I sought for him, but he could not be found. 37 Mark the blameless man, and behold the upright; for the man of peace will have posterity. 38 But transgressors will be altogether destroyed; the posterity of the wicked will be cut off. 39 But the salvation of the righteous is from the Lord; He is their strength in time of trouble. 40 The Lord helps them and delivers them; He delivers them from the wicked and saves them, because they take refuge in Him.

God is in control of everything and His will will be done. I know this is true but I dont think that I throughout my day realize it or want it. How often do we cry out not my will but Yours be done? I know Im a selfish person, that was the sin that I identified when I first gave my testimony to my fellowship in high school. But I dont think I really knew what I was saying when I shared that night. Being a selfish person I want what I think God would want to happen, but of course that always involves something to my benefit. I want my friends to be saved so that I can talk to them and still maintain their friendships, I want my parents to be saved so that I dont have to carry the burden around all the time, I want to do well in school because I know that I can and theres no excuse for me not to, I want to serve in the church and go on missions because the opportunities are there and they can use me. This is all perverted thinking! It sickens me how true this list is. I want God's will to be done before my own and I wouldnt want it any other way.

Psalm 36

Psalm 36

1Transgression speaks to the ungodly within his heart;
There is no fear of God before his eyes.
2For it flatters him in his own eyes
Concerning the discovery of his iniquity and the hatred of it.
3The words of his mouth are wickedness and deceit;
He has ceased to be wise and to do good.
4He plans wickedness upon his bed;
He sets himself on a path that is not good;
He does not despise evil.
5Your lovingkindness, O LORD, extends to the heavens,
Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
6Your righteousness is like the mountains of God;
Your judgments are like a great deep
O LORD, You preserve man and beast.
7How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God!
And the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings.
8They drink their fill of the abundance of Your house;
And You give them to drink of the river of Your delights.
9For with You is the fountain of life;
In Your light we see light.
10O continue Your lovingkindness to those who know You,
And Your righteousness to the upright in heart.
11Let not the foot of pride come upon me,
And let not the hand of the wicked drive me away.
12There the doers of iniquity have fallen;
They have been thrust down and cannot rise.

Sorry girls for another late post. This weekend has been a rollercoaster of emotions for me. But God is still and always will be good. =) I'm listening to "Glory in the highest" by Chris Tomlin as I right this to block out the noise from the living room. This psalm talks about me...it talks about you and it talks about all of man. Before God gave us light to see light, we were ungodly. We did not fear God, all that we saw was through our own eyes and knowledge, all that we spoke were words of deceit, and all that we planned was not good. Girls, to think that we were walking toward evil! We were walking towards hell. I am so glad that the psalm doesn't end there...that our lives don't end at verse 4. Only the lovingkindness of God which reaches to the heavens could cover and take away my sins which reach to the heavens. Only by God' Word, by His covenants, are man and beast preserved from devastating waters...and are now being kept from the fire until the day of judgment. How precious is our salvation girls...that children of faulty men could become children of the perfect God. God satisfies. God gives us joy. God lets us see things in a new light. He protects us from ourselves and from those who do not know what love is...love that sacrifices everything to bring you to the best thing...God. Whatever you're going through girls...your trials...your hurts...your worries...know that God is good. Really know it...in the depths of your heart and soul. We have the love of God. Such things are too wonderful for us. I love you girls. Let's strive harder to love our great, great God.

Psalm 35

Psalm 35

1Plead my cause, O LORD, with them that strive with me: fight against them that fight against me.
2Take hold of shield and buckler, and stand up for mine help.
3Draw out also the spear, and stop the way against them that persecute me: say unto my soul, I am thy salvation.
4Let them be confounded and put to shame that seek after my soul: let them be turned back and brought to confusion that devise my hurt.
5Let them be as chaff before the wind: and let the angel of the LORD chase them.
6Let their way be dark and slippery: and let the angel of the LORD persecute them.
7For without cause have they hid for me their net in a pit, which without cause they have digged for my soul.
8Let destruction come upon him at unawares; and let his net that he hath hid catch himself: into that very destruction let him fall.
9And my soul shall be joyful in the LORD: it shall rejoice in his salvation.
10All my bones shall say, LORD, who is like unto thee, which deliverest the poor from him that is too strong for him, yea, the poor and the needy from him that spoileth him?
11False witnesses did rise up; they laid to my charge things that I knew not.
12They rewarded me evil for good to the spoiling of my soul.
13But as for me, when they were sick, my clothing was sackcloth: I humbled my soul with fasting; and my prayer returned into mine own bosom.
14I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother: I bowed down heavily, as one that mourneth for his mother.
15But in mine adversity they rejoiced, and gathered themselves together: yea, the abjects gathered themselves together against me, and I knew it not; they did tear me, and ceased not:
16With hypocritical mockers in feasts, they gnashed upon me with their teeth.
17Lord, how long wilt thou look on? rescue my soul from their destructions, my darling from the lions.
18I will give thee thanks in the great congregation: I will praise thee among much people.
19Let not them that are mine enemies wrongfully rejoice over me: neither let them wink with the eye that hate me without a cause.
20For they speak not peace: but they devise deceitful matters against them that are quiet in the land.
21Yea, they opened their mouth wide against me, and said, Aha, aha, our eye hath seen it.
22This thou hast seen, O LORD: keep not silence: O Lord, be not far from me.
23Stir up thyself, and awake to my judgment, even unto my cause, my God and my Lord.
24Judge me, O LORD my God, according to thy righteousness; and let them not rejoice over me.
25Let them not say in their hearts, Ah, so would we have it: let them not say, We have swallowed him up.
26Let them be ashamed and brought to confusion together that rejoice at mine hurt: let them be clothed with shame and dishonour that magnify themselves against me.
27Let them shout for joy, and be glad, that favour my righteous cause: yea, let them say continually, Let the LORD be magnified, which hath pleasure in the prosperity of his servant.
28And my tongue shall speak of thy righteousness and of thy praise all the day long.

Hello, friends! i'm writing from the comfort of my own bed at home right now. it's so cool how the gospel really IS present everywhere in the Bible. in verse 3--"say unto my soul, I am thy salvation." we all know that our salvation is Jesus Christ. but how does that knowledge affect us? verse 9 says, "my soul shall be joyful in the Lord: it shall rejoice in his salvation." and verse 28 says, "my tongue shall speak of thy righteousness and of thy praise all the day long" mmmm. sometimes when i read the Bible, especially the psalms, it seems like these are all just metaphors and hyperboles, but since our God is infinite, who says our worship to him cant be infinite? it's amazing how even psalms--simple praises and supplications to God--reveal things to us about how our lifestyles should be.

i have to go now, goodnight!!

Psalm 34 [edited]

Psalm 34

Of David. When he pretended to be insane before Abimelech, who drove him away, and he left.

1 [a] I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.
2 My soul will boast in the LORD;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
 3 Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.
4 I sought the LORD, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.
5 Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.
6 This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.
7 The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.
8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
9 Fear the LORD, you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing.
10 The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.
11 Come, my children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the LORD.
12 Whoever of you loves life
and desires to see many good days,
13 keep your tongue from evil
and your lips from speaking lies.
14 Turn from evil and do good;
seek peace and pursue it.
15 The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their cry;
16 the face of the LORD is against those who do evil,
to cut off the memory of them from the earth.
17 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
19 A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;
20 he protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken.
21 Evil will slay the wicked;
the foes of the righteous will be condemned.
22 The LORD redeems his servants;
no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him.
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

Sorry i am late again. i thought I calculated right since I left my power chord at school this weekend and couldn't turn my
computer wrong but i was a day off. The whole psalm is wonderful but I picked verse 18 : "The LORD is close to the
brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." I picked it because it just so good to know that God is near the
suffering, the meek, and the humble. We might think that God would be near those who are strong and mighty, the
dragonslayers, the outspoken but he is with the smallest of men. It is not that the dragonslayers don't have God but rather that
the external cannot dictate the internal and the eternal. Those who feel so small and so weak and such a mess find refuge in God.
he is our saviour. How can he save if there is nothing to save? If we are so proud we do not believe we need saving? Our messy
 struggles and wayward hearts keep us brokenhearted calling out to the Lord you saves.

-sarah

Psalm 33

Praise to the Creator and Preserver.

1^(A)Sing for joy in the LORD, O you righteous ones;
Praise is ^(B)becoming to the upright.
2Give thanks to the LORD with the ^(C)lyre;
Sing praises to Him with a ^(D)harp of ten strings.
3Sing to Him a ^(E)new song;
Play skillfully with ^(F)a shout of joy.
4For the word of the LORD ^(G)is upright,
And all His work is done ^(H)in faithfulness.
5He ^(I)loves righteousness and justice;
The ^(J)earth is full of the lovingkindness of the LORD.
6By the ^(K)word of the LORD the heavens were made,
And ^(L)by the breath of His mouth ^(M)all their host.
7He gathers the ^(N)waters of the sea together as a heap;
He lays up the deeps in storehouses.
8Let ^(O)all the earth fear the LORD;
Let all the inhabitants of the world ^(P)stand in awe of Him.
9For ^(Q)He spoke, and it was done;
He commanded, and it stood fast.
10The LORD ^(R)nullifies the counsel of the nations;
He frustrates the plans of the peoples.
11The ^(S)counsel of the LORD stands forever,
The ^(T)plans of His heart from generation to generation.
12Blessed is the ^(U)nation whose God is the LORD,
The people whom He has ^(V)chosen for His own inheritance.
13The LORD ^(W)looks from heaven;
He ^(X)sees all the sons of men;
14From ^(Y)His dwelling place He looks out
On all the inhabitants of the earth,
15He who ^(Z)fashions the hearts of them all,
He who ^(AA)understands all their works.
16^(AB)The king is not saved by a mighty army;
A warrior is not delivered by great strength.
17A ^(AC)horse is a false hope for victory;
Nor does it deliver anyone by its great strength.
18Behold, ^(AD)the eye of the LORD is on those who fear Him,
On those who ^(AE)hope for His lovingkindness,
19To ^(AF)deliver their soul from death
And to keep them alive ^(AG)in famine.
20Our soul ^(AH)waits for the LORD;
He is our ^(AI)help and our shield.
21For our ^(AJ)heart rejoices in Him,
Because we trust in His holy name.
22Let Your lovingkindness, O LORD, be upon us,
According as we have hoped in You.

im in the clicc lab at powell right now and its pretty dark outside. i was sitting outside the steps earlier eating oranges and was looking at royce hall, it was so beautiful, and thought, wow...im lucky to be here at UCLA. then i wondered if i ever really stand in awe of God. this psalm is titled praise to the creator and the preserver. lately, i've been struggling alot trying to do my spiritual life on my own, if that makes any sense at all. i've been trying to be perfect through a series of deeds, as if i could find more favor in God through rituals like we've been reading the books of Moses. i keep remembering CJ mahaney's sermons about grace. and what the Bible says about grace. that it was God's grace that saved me in the first place and it will be God's grace the brings me home. im scared of the future i guess, im scared of failing and amounting to nothing, at least on worldly terms. but what a great opportunity to trust in God s'more and examine my heart and really trust him with my future, and one way is not despairing in the present. who by worrying can add a single hour to his life? im amazed at the psalmist's hope in God, and complete trust in God. you can tell that he knows that without God, he would be nothing, and would not even exist. Ashley talked about joy in her last post, and i trully desire for joy to overflow in my heart. but im still stuck in my shortminded ways. looking to whats next, instead of looking to eternity. what does it mean to find joy in ever station? how is that accomplished, because i know putting my hope in meaningless things, brings meaningless results, and even if i get the thing i so desired, the joy is gone, and the desire for something new arises. Finding joy in Christ is the only way! go figure! finding joy in everything station in the Lord. that way, Paul learned to be content in anything situation, with much and with little, because he could do all things through Him who strengthened him. im tired of the things i put my joy in and put my hope in, up til now, they have all failed me. only Christ hasn't failed. and he hasn't failed since the beginning and promised not to till the end.

What peace and joy is found in Christ.
Oh that we would realize it.

Pslam 32

1 How blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered! 2 How blessed is the man to whom the Lord does not impute iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit!

3 When I keep silent about my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long. 4 For day and night Your had was heavy upon me; my vitality was drained away as with the fever heat of summer. Selah. 5 I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I did not hide; I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the Lord"; and You forgave the guilt of my sin. Selah. 6 Therefore, let everyone who is godly pray to You in a time when You may be found; surely in a flood of great waters they will not reach him. 7 You are my hiding place; You preserve me from trouble; You surround me with songs of deliverance. Selah.

8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. 9 Do not be as the horse or as the mule which have no understanding, whose trappings include bit and bridle to hold them in check, otherwise they will not come near to you. 10 Many are the sorrows of the wicked, but he who trusts in the Lord, lovingkindness shall surround him. 11 Be glad in the Lord and rejoice, you righteous ones; and shout for joy, all you who are upright in heart.

Even thought we've been through all the beatitudes, and hear countless sermons on the glory of the gospel and how God is so merciful and good and gracious to us, its difficult to be in a state where i am joyous beyond compare. But i think focusing more on my sin and how i offend the holy, perfect, righteous God of creation every single day would lead me to be more joyous. Then i think about how often i focus on that, it isnt quite often, and i realize that focusing on it too much is not good without the realization that God has blessed us with the gift of eternal life and that we are perfect in Gods eyes because of Jesus' suffering, dying, and rising again. stop and smile :) and praise God for His plan to save us before we were even born. Here also we see guilt and a general feeling of unhappiness for David when he did not confess his sin. Confession is important, ive heard that said so many times, its nothing new, but that doesnt change the importance of it. Theres something about acknowledging your sin before God and wrestling through how to fight that behavior and then realizing that God is using that sin to sanctify us because He loves us, all of that is hard work but will cause us to reap so much more. I really like verse 9 and the illustration that David uses to warn against not having a blind faith, a faith that is not your own, a shallow understanding of what it is you really believe in. Those little bits in a horses mouth that control where the horse goes should be our own understanding of truth and God's character and nothing else. I love you guys, i realize i didnt really share that in depth yesterday because i think i was on the verge of being braindead, ill try harder next time to be more open. Shout for joy, all you (thats us!) who are upright in heart :D

Psalm 31

Psalm 31

1In You, O LORD, I have taken refuge;
Let me never be ashamed;
In Your righteousness deliver me.
2Incline Your ear to me, rescue me quickly;
Be to me a rock of strength,
A stronghold to save me.
3For You are my rock and my fortress;
For Your name's sake You will lead me and guide me.
4You will pull me out of the net which they have secretly laid for me,
For You are my strength.
5Into Your hand I commit my spirit;
You have ransomed me, O LORD, God of truth.
6I hate those who regard vain idols,
But I trust in the LORD.
7I will rejoice and be glad in Your lovingkindness,
Because You have seen my affliction;
You have known the troubles of my soul,
8And You have not given me over into the hand of the enemy;
You have set my feet in a large place.
9Be gracious to me, O LORD, for I am in distress;
My eye is wasted away from grief, my soul and my body also.
10For my life is spent with sorrow
And my years with sighing;
My strength has failed because of my iniquity,
And my body has wasted away.
11Because of all my adversaries, I have become a reproach,
Especially to my neighbors,
And an object of dread to my acquaintances;
Those who see me in the street flee from me.
12I am forgotten as a dead man, out of mind;
I am like a broken vessel.
13For I have heard the slander of many,
Terror is on every side;
While they took counsel together against me,
They schemed to take away my life.
14But as for me, I trust in You, O LORD,
I say, "You are my God."
15My times are in Your hand;
Deliver me from the hand of my enemies and from those who persecute me.
16Make Your face to shine upon Your servant;
Save me in Your lovingkindness.
17Let me not be put to shame, O LORD, for I call upon You;
Let the wicked be put to shame, let them be silent in Sheol.
18Let the lying lips be mute,
Which speak arrogantly against the righteous
With pride and contempt.
19How great is Your goodness,
Which You have stored up for those who fear You,
Which You have wrought for those who take refuge in You,
Before the sons of men!
20You hide them in the secret place of Your presence from the conspiracies of man;
You keep them secretly in a shelter from the strife of tongues.
21Blessed be the LORD,
For He has made marvelous His lovingkindness to me in a besieged city.
22As for me, I said in my alarm,
"I am cut off from before Your eyes";
Nevertheless You heard the voice of my supplications
When I cried to You.
23O love the LORD, all you His godly ones!
The LORD preserves the faithful
And fully recompenses the proud doer.
24Be strong and let your heart take courage,
All you who hope in the LORD.

sorry i posted this a day late. i should have posted before i went to sg. hopefully ash will still post today. i like reading our posts and seeing how God will change our attitudes and responses to His Word. when i read this psalm two days ago...(i forgot that my day was on tuesday...thought it was on monday)...i was struck again by how much these writers knew God. that they could dwell and pray truth because they knew the truth. how can we pray to God for vindication if we know not of His righteousness (v.1)? how can we pray for strength if we know not of His power (v.2)? how can we pray for His leading if we know not of His desire for His own glory to be shown through us (v.3)? and the list goes on as we read through the rest of this psalm. David always brings everything back to God. oftentimes we see him talking things through with God. and as he repeats these truths...any struggles that he has usually are overshadowed by the truth of God. that's why our worship never changes...because God never changes. that's why we can live with so much joy because of our salvation. i love the last verse...be strong and let your heart take courage...all of us who hope in the Lord. we are not weak Christians. we live with the power of God working through our lives. the victory is already won! when you think about that more...your heart just wants to burst with praise for God. how quickly we forget...and how gracious God is to remind.
i came back from class earlier today. i have another ee class later today, but im feeling a little bit sick. rejoice with me girls if you are tired as i am from a late sg. i am going to try to be better about the time issue...with God's help i'll learn how to be a better leader, but i wouldn't trade this feeling for anything. how good it is to be tired from studying God's Word! how good it is to be tired from struggling with and learning to love the body of Christ! how good it is that God would choose such weak vessels as me to hold such riches of truth! God is so good to us. like David...i hope that at the end of this year...our little efforts to understand God through His word can help us really know Him better...and as a result of that...love Him better...Him the Eternal Lover of our souls. rejoice with me girls. =)

Psalm 30

1 I will extol thee, O LORD; for thou hast lifted me up, and hast not made my foes to rejoice over me.
2 O LORD my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.
3 O LORD, thou hast brought up my soul from the grave: thou hast kept me alive, that I should not go down to the pit.
4 Sing unto the LORD, O ye saints of his, and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness.
5 For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
6 And in my prosperity I said, I shall never be moved.
7 LORD, by thy favour thou hast made my mountain to stand strong: thou didst hide thy face, and I was troubled.
8 I cried to thee, O LORD; and unto the LORD I made supplication.
9 What profit is there in my blood, when I go down to the pit? Shall the dust praise thee? shall it declare thy truth?
10 Hear, O LORD, and have mercy upon me: LORD, be thou my helper.
11 Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness;
12 To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.

Psalm 29

1(A)Ascribe to the LORD, O sons of the mighty,
Ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.
2Ascribe to the LORD the glory due to His name;
Worship the LORD (B)in holy array.
3The (C)voice of the LORD is upon the waters;
The God of glory (D)thunders,
The LORD is over (E)many waters.
4The voice of the LORD is (F)powerful,
The voice of the LORD is majestic.
5The voice of the LORD breaks the cedars;
Yes, the LORD breaks in pieces (G)the cedars of Lebanon.
6He makes Lebanon (H)skip like a calf,
And (I)Sirion like a young wild ox.
7The voice of the LORD hews out flames of fire.
8The voice of the LORD shakes the wilderness;
The LORD shakes the wilderness of (J)Kadesh.
9The voice of the LORD makes (K)the deer to calve
And strips the forests bare;
And (L)in His temple everything says, "Glory!"
10The LORD sat as King at the (M)flood;
Yes, the LORD sits as (N)King forever.
11The LORD will give (O)strength to His people;
The LORD will bless His people with (P)peace.

This psalm screams out glory and awesome might. It's the same amazing God who feels distant or not quite the same. I know that he's the same God throughout all time but I still wish I could get to know this God. A God of glory and strength, a holy God I know but the one whose glory thunders, whose powerful voice breaks the cedars, hews out flames of fire, shakes the wilderness-how can I understand him today? Is he hurricane Katrina breaking down cedars, the forest fires in California is that the equivalent? Or is the psalmist illustration of powerful nature simply an illustration of our own powerlessness in our lives and God being powerful in it? Therefore seen in any uncontrollable aspect of our lives. Fighting my lack of faith and the consequences of not having faith.. Surely this God is the God that sent the pillar of fire and smoke to guide the Israelites and punished Miriam with leprosy and just as easily healed her. Our faith is awarded with appropriate responses right? Like the missionary irene was telling us about who went to Japan with her passport and the man with the faith without one and like Peter who fell into the water while walking across it. Then my inability to see this glorious and powerful God who grants peace will kill my mom because I have not faith enough for him. Sorry girls I wouldn't have written it but in trying not to be prideful I'm just truthfully writing what's in my head.

Psalm 28

A Prayer for Help, and Praise for Its Answer.

A Psalm of David.

1To You, O LORD, I call;
My ^(A)rock, do not be deaf to me,
For if You ^(B)are silent to me,
I will become like those who ^(C)go down to the pit.
2Hear the ^(D)voice of my supplications when I cry to You for help,
When I ^(E)lift up my hands ^(F)toward ^[a]Your holy ^(G)sanctuary.
3^(H)Do not drag me away with the wicked
And with those who work iniquity,
Who ^(I)speak peace with their neighbors,
While evil is in their hearts.
4Requite them ^(J)according to their work and according to the evil of their practices;
Requite them according to the deeds of their hands;
Repay them their ^[b]recompense.
5Because they ^(K)do not regard the works of the LORD
Nor the deeds of His hands,
He will tear them down and not build them up.
6Blessed be the LORD,
Because He ^(L)has heard the voice of my supplication.
7The LORD is my ^(M)strength and my ^(N)shield;
My heart ^(O)trusts in Him, and I am helped;
Therefore ^(P)my heart exults,
And with ^(Q)my song I shall thank Him.
8The LORD is their ^(R)strength,
And He is a ^(S)saving defense to His anointed.
9^(T)Save Your people and bless ^(U)Your inheritance;
Be their ^(V)shepherd also, and ^(W)carry them forever.


wow, its already been the 28th day. praise God for his faithfulness.

David calls upon the Lord when he needs help. and rightly so, because who is more helpful than God? who is more faithful? Without God, he says he will become like those who go down to the pit. when im really in trouble, my heart automatically tries to feel better, in various ways, but rarely do i stop and think about Biblical truth to guide me how to think and put things in perspective. But the truth is my sword as we've talked about. it is sharper than a double edged sword, able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. its amazing that i have this hope, and still turn to other things. its not sensible at all. when you're able to eat a five star dinner, why would you stuff yourself with hot dogs. and that example is not enough to really explain the doubt and distrust in God that really goes on, and has been going on since the beginning.

David's faith in God! constantly displayed. CONSTANTLY. no matter WHAT. his heart trust in him. everything thats going on is really tuning my faith, and for that im sooo grateful. not only does he trust God, his heart exults, he sings song of thanks to Him. by feeding myself the trust, hopefully i will come to a place where i really rejoice and praise God for trials because i know that God is more concerned for my character than my comfort, and is doing it all for MY GOOD, and because he LOVES me.

Psalm 27

1 The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense of my life; whom shall I dread? 2 When evildoers came upon me to devour my flesh, my adversaries and my enemies, they stumbled and fell. 3 Though a host encamp against me, my hear will not fear; though war arise against me, in spite of this I shall be confident.

4 One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord and to meditate in His temple. 5 For in the day of trouble He will conceal me in His tabernacle; in the secret place of His tent He will hide me; He will lift me up on a rock. 6 And now my head will be lifted up above my enemies around me, and i will offer in His tent sacrifices with shouts of joy; I will sing, yes I will sing praises to the Lord.

7 Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice, and be gracious to me and answer me. 8 When You said, "Seek My face," my heart said to You, "Your face, O Lord, I shall seek." 9 Do not hide Your face from me, Do not turn Your servant away in anger; You have been my help; Do not abandon me nor forsake me, O God of my salvation! 10 For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me up.

11 Teach me Your way, O Lord, and lead me in a level path because of my foes. 12 Do not deliver me over to the desire of my adversaries, for false witnesses have risen against me, and such as breathe out violence. 13 I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. 14 Wait for the Lord; be strong and let yout heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord.

so after working out with Irene yesterday, the only part of my body that is sore is my left butt cheek, but anyway
I kind of feel like this psalm is all over the place in terms of what david is praying about. The first verse :: The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? :: is i think both good and bad to think about. God as our light guides our way and contrasts us from the rest of this world, and He provided the best thing of all, our salvation, what else is there that we need? But then I think about how much i cling onto my posessions for comfort, myself for pride and selfishness, and man to hear their praise. Ive been thinking a lot about africa, partially because of the class im taking on its history, and because of Urbana and the fact that i want to on on missions there and i was just really thankful to be able to brush my teeth this morning. i guess im getting all over the place too with this post, but i started singing some of worship songs in my head once i got to verse 4, actually i think a lot of songs were taken from this passage.

im getting flustered because so many thoughts are entering my brain and i dont know how to put them all down. to have a heart that cries to God, Your face, O Lord, I shall seek, would be incredible and a big step from the hear that I possess now. God is the God of our salvation, say that really slow, our s a l v a t i o n and we will one day get to be in His presence. we would be in such deep despair and maybe not even know it if God had not given us hope to be in the land of the living.

Psalm 26

Psalm 26

1Vindicate me, O LORD,
for I have walked in my integrity,
and I have trusted in the LORD without wavering.
2Prove me, O LORD, and try me;
test my heart and my mind.
3For your steadfast love is before my eyes,
and I walk in your faithfulness.

4I do not sit with men of falsehood,
nor do I consort with hypocrites.
5I hate the assembly of evildoers,
and I will not sit with the wicked.

6I wash my hands in innocence
and go around your altar, O LORD,
7proclaiming thanksgiving aloud,
and telling all your wondrous deeds.

8O LORD, I love the habitation of your house
and the place where your glory dwells.
9Do not sweep my soul away with sinners,
nor my life with bloodthirsty men,
10 in whose hands are evil devices,
and whose right hands are full of bribes.

11But as for me, I shall walk in my integrity;
redeem me, and be gracious to me.
12My foot stands on level ground;
in the great assembly I will bless the LORD.

i had a break between tabling and my only class for the day at two...so i went to the engineering library and read this psalm. i signed up for tabling before i started this thing, so tabling today was kind of hard. i have been debating as to how to minimize attention towards myself...and i think that this will all fade after a week after ppl get used to it.
when i read this psalm i was thinking of what kind of man david must have been if he could pray a prayer like this. is this what i am asking as i partake this one month "oath of silence" as it has been nicknamed by various ppl. i know that i do not walk with integrity....nor does my trust not waver in the Lord. i don't have the courage to ask God to examine me and try me and test my mind and my heart. and yet the next part of the psalm talks about the other ppl...those that walk without integrity...those that do not trsut in God but go about trusting in themselves. it dawned on me again that God is the one Person we should turn to for everything. He is everything. and if i know that...why can't i live it? i am of such little faith. if Jesus were to return would we recognize Him? or would we pass Him by because we have made Him out to be someone else...someone like ourselves...myself. to stand on level ground...and bless the Lord among His people. its what we should long to do now...its what we should long to do in heaven. i have so much to learn...

Psalm 25

Psalm 25

1Unto thee, O LORD, do I lift up my soul.

2O my God, I trust in thee: let me not be ashamed, let not mine enemies triumph over me.

3Yea, let none that wait on thee be ashamed: let them be ashamed which transgress without cause.

4Shew me thy ways, O LORD; teach me thy paths.

5Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for thou art the God of my salvation; on thee do I wait all the day.

6Remember, O LORD, thy tender mercies and thy lovingkindnesses; for they have been ever of old.

7Remember not the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions: according to thy mercy remember thou me for thy goodness' sake, O LORD.

8Good and upright is the LORD: therefore will he teach sinners in the way.

9The meek will he guide in judgment: and the meek will he teach his way.

10All the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth unto such as keep his covenant and his testimonies.

11For thy name's sake, O LORD, pardon mine iniquity; for it is great.

12What man is he that feareth the LORD? him shall he teach in the way that he shall choose.

13His soul shall dwell at ease; and his seed shall inherit the earth.

14The secret of the LORD is with them that fear him; and he will shew them his covenant.

15Mine eyes are ever toward the LORD; for he shall pluck my feet out of the net.

16Turn thee unto me, and have mercy upon me; for I am desolate and afflicted.

17The troubles of my heart are enlarged: O bring thou me out of my distresses.

18Look upon mine affliction and my pain; and forgive all my sins.

19Consider mine enemies; for they are many; and they hate me with cruel hatred.

20O keep my soul, and deliver me: let me not be ashamed; for I put my trust in thee.

21Let integrity and uprightness preserve me; for I wait on thee.

22Redeem Israel, O God, out of all his troubles.

Heyy, sorry my posts have been quite delayed. Today's meeting was so awesome!! God is so good to us. sitting there, listening to you guys talk, it occurred to me that i want to pray for you guys more, and it feels like i really love you girls--that even though i have no siblings and i'll never know what it feels like to have a sister, you guys are as close as it gets for me.

For the psalm, in verse 6, "Remember, O Lord, thy tender mercies and thy lovingkindnesses, for they have been ever of old," the words "ever of old" really struck me. it's just how God has been there since forever, loving us before the beginning of time--not even since the beginning of time, but BEFORE it, and that his qualities will never change--he will always be so gracious to us. And in verse 7, "remember thou me for thy goodness' sake," "thy goodness' sake" is just another reminder that God does everything for His glory. his very character of being so good prohibits him from neglecting us--that because he is infinitely loving, he will never forsake us. it's such a far cry from our nature as humans to be so fickle and so unreliable. "for thy name's sake" in verse 11 is another reminder of God's glory as the most important thing of all. it's not about us, but it's all for his glory. we always forget how small we are before the Lord. from verse 20 and 21, the Lord keeps my soul. I put my trust in him. integrity and uprightness come from the Lord--he gives us strength to endure and he provides everything we need. we KNOW that we don't need to worry or be afraid or make any compromises, but i find it so hard to fully let go of everything and trust in the Lord completely, even though he's been teaching me so much about that of late. the Lord is so kind to us. it's pretty amazing that all the laws in leviticus and the old testament--all the requirements for different kinds of offerings and etc, we're now exempt from that because of the blood of Jesus. 2 things: that Jesus would die for us, and that Jesus' blood was so powerful that it took care of ALL our sins, past and present. those 2 things are so amazing to me right now. God is so good and we dont deserve him, but still he makes so many accommodations for us! so much love. hehe.

Psalm 24

1The (A)earth is the LORD'S, and [a]all it contains,
The (B)world, and those who dwell in it.
2For He has (C)founded it upon the seas
And established it upon the rivers.
3Who may (D)ascend into the (E)hill of the LORD?
And who may stand in His holy (F)place?
4He who has (G)clean hands and a (H)pure heart,
Who has not (I)lifted up his soul to falsehood
And has not (J)sworn deceitfully.
5He shall receive a (K)blessing from the LORD
And (L)righteousness from the God of his salvation.
6This is the generation of those who (M)seek Him,
Who seek Your face--even Jacob. Selah.
7(N)Lift up your heads, O gates,
And be lifted up, O [b]ancient doors,
That the King of (O)glory may come in!
8Who is the King of glory?
The LORD (P)strong and mighty,
The LORD (Q)mighty in battle.
9Lift up your heads, O gates,
And lift them up, O [c]ancient doors,
That the King of (R)glory may come in!
10Who is this King of glory?
The LORD of (S)hosts,
He is the King of glory. Selah.

After trying password after password sending myself the password and verifying my account and logging in from another place and then coming back and discovering that I had the right password all along but for some reason it kept throwing it out anyways, I have come to the conclusing that this blog does not like me. haha not really just google. but anyhow...
do you ever wonder if the grand God you read about in the old testament could be the same God you understand now? The God who wins battles and comes in a cloud of smoke, who speaks out in his mighty voice seems like just a shade of the intimate God I feel like I know now. or sometimes just feels like a distant story of a God. Instead of winning huge battles and keeping the sun from setting we feel God's power in smaller ways or in stationary ways (from nature). But the great God of the Old Testament is someone I'd like to get to know. He's a God who would surely and quickly strike terror in my heart and have me fall facedown before him. Hopefully he is one who I would fear and respect enough not to sin against so often. (You'd think so until you see the Israelites). He in his glory set far apart revealed in nature and in faithfulness I would still like to understand.

Psalm 23

Psalm 23

1The LORD is my ^(A)shepherd,
I shall ^(B)not want.
2He makes me lie down in ^(C)green pastures;
He ^(D)leads me beside ^(E)quiet waters.
3He ^(F)restores my soul;
He ^(G)guides me in the ^(H)paths of righteousness
For His name's sake.
4Even though I ^(I)walk through the ^[a]valley of the shadow of death,
I ^(J)fear no ^[b]evil, for ^(K)You are with me;
Your ^(L)rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
5You ^(M)prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You have ^(N)anointed my head with oil;
My ^(O)cup overflows.
6Surely ^(P)goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will ^[c](Q)dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

if you think of sheep, they don't ask they're shepherd for anything. (they can't talk for that matter, except in movies like babe and dr. dolittle but im getting off the subject.) they trust in their shepherd, follow him and know his voice. this first line is a tremendous statement of faith and trust in God. The Lord is my shepherd, i shall not want. its not.. oh i'll try not to want stuff, its no, yahway is my shepherd, i will trust in him and he provides. Verse 2 backs up his verse 1, giving examples of the Lord's faithfulness and why he trusts in him. same with verse 3. verse 2 tells of something any normal shepherd could possibly do, but builds on his examples with verse three, Restoring one's soul. guiding one on the paths of righteousness, for his name's sake, something only God can do, properly. Verse 4, is another unbelievable statement of faith. even though his circumstances, even though he walk through the shadow of death, he will fear no evil, for he knows the truth, and that is that the Lord is with him. (its so important to tell yourself truth, and not let yourself get carried away with feelings, especially if those feelings arent based in truth. and how do we know truth, oh yeah the bible. oh yeah we're reading it. good deal.) He is comforted by the truth. i dont know how literal verse 5 is as in if God literally prepares a table for him, im not really getting what that means, and the oil part either. verse 6 is another faith statement. surely! goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, and i will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. he is thinking eternally. For God's name sake he keeps his way blameless so he may dwell in God's throneroom. and they're were sacrifices too i guess back then? God forgave them of their sins...well, its a good thing we're living in the now. i dont understand alot of stuff.

hahaha. i wanted to try to analyze it like something we did in english AP lit alot last year. but seriously as i was reading this, i felt calm in my heart. its funny that i need to be remind EVERYDAY of God's majesty and faithfulness and his sovereignty. and everyday i am reminded, im in awe like its the first time i heard it. going through some things right now and i really wanna share with you guys, but honestly... i dont know how to say it. its not like some major crisis or anything gigantic like that so dont worry haha. all the things are things i've touched on at one point or another in smallgroup. its just life thats kinda happening. i can feeeeeeeel the sanctification happening, but im so callous and so resistant to change. pray for me that i have a humble heart, gentle and quiet spirit, and as an act of faith, submit my will to Him. He who restores my soul; He who guides me in the paths of righteousness for His name sake. He who makes my cup overflow.

my heart is full thinking of you guys.